178: How to Keep Showing Up for Your Business When You’re Exhausted

Ever felt like your full-time job is swallowing all your time and energy, leaving nothing for your business, creativity, or dreams? That was me last week. New job, kids, travel, business ideas… and zero time to breathe. I felt trapped, frustrated, and on the verge of burnout.

In today’s episode, I share:

• What triggered this wave of overwhelm
• Why being the primary provider makes quitting your 9–5 not an option
• The 10-step process I use to move from “I can’t do this anymore” to calm, grounded action
• How overwhelm can actually be training for the next version of you as a business owner

This is for you if:

• Your 9–5 is draining your energy
• You’re a mom juggling work, kids, and a side business
• You feel behind, stuck, or scared you’re losing momentum
• You want practical and emotional tools to keep going

Links Mentioned:
🎧 Free course – Your First Brave Step: Build your coaching business in 1 hour a day without quitting your job or being on social media 24/7: https://sharonsinghsidhu.com/start

💬 Book a Power Hour (HR-safe visibility, side business planning): https://calendly.com/sharonsinghsidhu/powerhour

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:01

Hi there and welcome back to another episode of the podcast. So um I'm re-recording this podcast because I had just spoken for the past half an hour and realized I didn't hit the record button, which is I feel really dumb doing that now. But anyway, I'm glad to be able to have that rehearsal um and talk to you today about the topic around what happens, like what can you do if you feel overwhelmed, like your nine to five job or everything that you're doing uh is kind of feeling very overwhelming and leaves you very little time to grow your business on the side, right? And so this happened to me last week. So over the past week, I'm recording this on a Sunday, and I would say like this past week, while I felt so overwhelmed, and you know, I was really frustrated and was feeling these very strong, intense feelings uh as a result, actually, primarily because I recently started a new job, and so with a new job, there's always a lot of adjustments. I did not expect the adjustments to be um taking so much of my energy. It's not so much that the work is hard, but I think it's just that um, you know, I had moved from a role that I had become so comfortable with. I suppose I was very much in my comfort zone, um, and also doing uh my previous role was really a dream job, right? It was really kind of everything I wanted to do in talent development as a leadership facilitator, and this new role has uh less of that and a little bit more of what we call the HR business partnering element of it, which was something I had stepped away from deliberately, intentionally, uh almost like a decade ago, because I um wasn't something particularly I enjoyed, and you might be wondering then why move into the new role? So, of course, I have many reasons for why I decided to do that, but I also decided that it would be fine because it is still a combination, as in I still get to do the thing that I uh really enjoy, which is really more of the you know talent development portion of it and facilitating leadership uh workshops. Uh, and at and so I thought that you know it would be pretty balanced, and I also did realize that I was getting very much in my comfort zone, and I felt like it was time for a change. So for me, I I mean it's probably the longest job I've ever been in because I remember when I was younger, it's like I could not stay in the one same place doing the same thing for too long, and um, I felt like I was really stagnating and my skills were dropping, and um, of course, I have the business on the side, and that always really helped me to fill up the part like the part that was not so fulfilling about being sometimes in a corporate role. Um, but the business always was able to fill that, and so that was quite a nice balance. But anyway, long story short, it just came time and it was the right time, you know. I was approached for the role, and it just seemed like a good time, and so I did that. But wow, I did not expect it to um be so hard, okay. I did not expect it to hit me as hard as it did, uh, in terms of the um all the changes, right? Like just even simple things like just knowing who um is doing what and the processes is uh and it's really more about that, like knowing where to look for what, right? And so, anyway, the past week was um particularly challenging, I think also because there were a number of things that were coming together. Um, you know, not that it was bad things, so I was supporting my son, my husband and I decided to um go along with my son for his first race outside of the country, so his first karting race outside of the country, so that was very exciting, and so that was over a weekend, and then um my daughter obviously is doing kind of her final year in her IB diploma, so that's also quite a challenging time, and also I want to be there to be supportive as a parent. Um, and so there was a lot of things going on, and uh, so that on top of that, I also had like quite a number of new ideas I wanted to implement for my business. In fact, I have been toying with the idea of putting this podcast, besides putting the episode on a podcast, to also record the videos, which I have started to record videos actually of me um speaking on the podcast to put it on um YouTube because I'm thinking I've been like getting a lot of uh messages and signs and signals about uh putting this podcast and recording it on video and uploading it on YouTube and start my own YouTube channel because I think especially more in this age of AI, right? Everything can be faked, can be generated, and um I thought like having putting my face on video on YouTube makes it more real, and I want you to be able to get to know me better, right, as well. And also, it was also in a way with this new role. I don't get to do as much facilitation and training as I would like, and so putting this on YouTube would be such a fantastic way for me to still continue to um feel fulfilled, you know, doing this teaching role and this sharing my ideas on video, um uh kind of like filling that void, right? And so I thought, okay, maybe that is also a good idea to pursue, and so I've been doing that as well. Um, and I've also been transitioning my business model more from being more one-on-one to be more like more group basis and maybe more productized, I guess would be the word, so that um I'm really trying to move my business model to one where there is more monthly recurring revenue as opposed to like a launch and then a cohort, and then you know, it's like kind of up and down, and they call it fees and famine, right? So, a lot of moving part over the past, I guess, come two, three months, and so it's been quite a lot, I think, for me to handle, and so I think everything just kind of came together last week, and I was feeling this intense, overwhelming emotions, resistance, and frustration all rolled into one, and it really left me with less time than I usually would have had for my business, and then it felt like I was also losing momentum on my business. So I have all these ideas, but I just didn't have the time and energy to get it done because I was also spending my my new job was demanding so much more of my time and energy, um, and putting in extra time even uh after office hours and even like during my lunchtime is usually when I would be engaging on LinkedIn, and I didn't have a chance to do that because there were like a number of lunchtime events, and also you know, there was just I was just taking more time to have to do things at work, and so therefore I would work through lunch sometimes, and so I think I was feeling the frustration and and drained, you know, that and and a little bit of like I was a bit heartbroken, I guess would be the word, that I didn't have as much time left to work on my business, right? And uh, it felt like I was losing momentum, especially when I had all these new things I wanted to do for the business. So, long story short, I was feeling so so so frustrated and overwhelmed, and then feeling like physically this chest pain and this pit in my stomach, and yet feeling trapped because I'm not in a position to be able to just quit my job. And obviously, my business is not yet quite at the level of where my job is in terms of the earning potential. Because I mean, I've been in the corporate world for like almost you know 20-something years now, and so I'm at the level where I'm earning a fairly decent amount of money that my business that I've just started uh you know, that's not so long ago, a few years ago. Obviously, it's not at that level yet, and so I'm it's not like as if I can just swap one for one. So I've got to do both at the moment. I'm also the primary earner, the person who like keeps the lights on, right? The kind of consistent regular paycheck that comes in, and so this feeling of trappedness, like feeling very frustrated, overwhelmed, and yet can't do, can't leave, right? Can't can't really felt like I could I didn't have much of a choice. And so it was at the point where I just felt like I could not even move forward, and I wanted to come on here to share what I did to help me to move forward, right? And I wrote down the 10 steps. Actually, I only managed to write down these 10 steps after I got through it, and I just want to say like if you're in a place where things are very difficult at the moment to see it as an opportunity, I know that it's not gonna feel like that in the moment because I know when I was frustrated, I was like, I just wanted to get relief and get out of this horrendous feeling. Um, but actually, it was just an opportunity because that was actually the very moment that was helping me to be able to hold those two opposing energies. On the one hand, there are all these dreams and goals you're pursuing, things you want to do, things you want to accomplish, even a paycheck that you need in order to provide for your family. You know you want to do this, that's why you're in you took the choice to not quit the job, right? And so you have all these things that you want, you desire, and then there are all these other frustrating moments, right? Like not enough, feeling like you don't have the time and the energy and the frustration and the resistance. But feeling this way while you have all these dreams and goals is an opportunity for you to expand your capacity to hold all of these opposing energies, right? It's very paradoxical, right? Like you have this opposing energies, this like resistance, this conflict, all of this. And if you look at all the successful people that you look up to, you aspire to be, the business owners or the leaders that are obviously holding a lot of responsibilities, and they are obviously able to hold all of these things. So if you want to be at that level, you have to elevate yourself to that version of you who is able to hold all of these things, right? All of these opposing energies. And by going through these so-called like challenging and difficult and frustrating, frustrating moments, it is your way or the universe's way of teaching you, giving you the chance to practice how to do it. It's an expert, it's an experiential training, you know, like you have to go through it to expand your capacity to be able to handle it. And so it's like this is exactly what you need. If all those things that you want to accomplish, this is the work that's required to get you there. Okay, and I know it's a lot easier said than done when you're in the moment, and that's the reason why I wanted to break down the 10 steps, which I wrote down in one of my morning journals um uh session. There were 10 steps that I I kind of took myself through. And I broke this down to very small steps because all these also can just happen either very quickly or there will be certain steps that you feel yourself stuck in for quite a some time, okay? Like I did. So the first step is to simply notice you're being reactive, simply notice what you're feeling. That's it, right? And so that's where meditation is very helpful. It helps you to be more self-aware so that you can actually notice yourself being reactive and feeling it, right? The second step is to allow yourself to feel it fully. You are a human being, all that you're an experiencing and feeling is just part of the human experience. So you can't just have all the good, right? So sometimes we also have difficult moments and difficult emotions, and it is just part and parcel of being human. So feel it. Step three is to what I call tame my ego. So the ego always wants to have instant relief, it wants instant gratification, it doesn't want anything that feels uncomfortable. And so what we want to do is just tame that, it's just simply to pause and notice, okay. We are reacting like that because we just want to push this away. We don't like this feeling that is uncomfortable, but it is the very feeling, the process that we need to go through so that we can get to the next level, a bigger, higher version of us, a better version of us, right? Who is able to hold all of this and still be able to regulate ourselves through all of this? So that's step three. Step four is I said to ask the creator or my authority for guidance. And so when I say creator, you can replace that with anything. The universe, source, higher intelligent being, your higher level of consciousness. I've been studying the Kabbala recently quite a bit, and so I use the creator, which is not God per se, it's more like to me, I see it's it's an energy, right? So it is about a higher level of energy. So like love versus fear, positive versus negative, to make it simplistic, right, for me to understand. So I always want to try to be like the light, um, the positive, the high vibe, right? The high frequency, the higher level of consciousness, the better version of myself, as opposed to the dark, which is the lower and the fear-based and the scarcity-based version of me, which is scared, angry, disappointed, um, dejected, discouraged, right? You can already feel it's a different vibe, right? And so we want to ask the creator, and the authority is just language in terms of the human design, um, language which is we are all guided by different authorities. Like I am what we call a sacral authority, which means that we are guided by our gut instincts, okay? And that's where our energy is most consistent, it's how we make decisions. And so I would just say, okay, I would just ask myself, how does it feel like? Does it feel like something I want to progress and move forward with? Yes or no? Is this the right time to do this right now? Yes or no? And so there are all these different techniques we can use using human design to help guide our decision and get guidance. And then step five is to act in accordance with that guidance, right? That's what self-trust is all about. Again, going back to the people we look up to, they don't always have the answers handed to them. They don't necessarily know exactly what to do when they are unsure. And so, yet they will still need to base on whatever the best um knowledge and information and authority and guidance that they have, and then they just act. And that is trusting yourself. Trusting yourself to be able to make a decision and to move forward and to act. And also trusting yourself to be able to handle it if the outcome is not exactly what you wanted it to be, which brings me to step six, which is to observe. Like after you've done the thing, you've taken the action based on the guidance, observe what happened, what was the outcome? And then step seven is to adjust, right? So sometimes things go exactly as you planned it to, and that's good because you want to notice, oh, what made that go smoothly? Like, what was it about the guidance or how I went about it that um helped me to make the right decision? And if things didn't work out as you thought it would, also the same thing, right? Observe and adjust. So sometimes I would think that I'm acting based on guidance from higher authority and higher con higher consciousness, but then when it doesn't happen the way I expected it to, I will reflect and then realize that oh, actually it was still my fear and ego driving the show, but disguising itself as a higher level of consciousness. So that's when I realized okay, I need to adjust. And then step eight is to then compile and document all the lessons. So I will make a note of it and update it into my so-called book of wisdom. That's step nine. And so for me, this book of wisdom is my podcast. And if I start a YouTube channel, probably my YouTube channel. Um and that's where I document everything. And then step ten is to then review this book of wisdom um regularly because you don't want to just do and then not really pause to reflect and then um review how everything was going, and most importantly, review and integrate it, right? Step 10 is review and integrate it. So integrate just means you apply it to your life, it just becomes who you are, it's your way of living, and that is exactly the act of elevating yourself to a higher version of yourself, right? So that's when you step up into the next level of you because now you no longer act and behave as you did before. Because you went through all these steps, you allow yourself to feel everything, you observe, you made adjustments, you act according to guidance, and then you reflected on it, and then you make it your way of life, and you probably would be acting and feeling and thinking in a different way, and that's actually a higher level of you, higher level of consciousness, and that's really how you get closer to your dreams and goals. Okay, and so I saw this as in the past week, this feeling that I was feeling as an opportunity, an opportunity to elevate myself to the level that I need to be in order to be that version of her who actually accomplishes those goals, who builds that business that she wants, who has the emotional regulation and composure of the people I look up to who are always able to maintain their calm, their confidence, their certainty, their composure. And so I want to be that version of me. And so the past week was just the steps that helped me to get to that version of me. The practice, the real life practice I needed to go through to get to that level of my that version of me. Okay, and so that's what I wanted to share with you today. Um, you know, if you are going through maybe not so easy situation, it is really an opportunity. Um, use these 10 steps. I have broken it down really into like, you know, really small step-by-step things that you can do, and sometimes it just, you know, the step that really helped me also was just actually just breathing. You know, it seems so so simple, but just even simply having the awareness that you can breathe through it, you can take a breath and you can release it, and you can even just do that, or you could even just um start with a step that you can even just be aware of the situation you're going through or how reactive you might be feeling. Okay, so these are just small things that you can do to help you to keep moving forward. So I hope you like this episode. Um, I'm re-recording it second time, like I said, because I forgot to hit record and I know I'm going over this quite quickly, so re-listen to it if you can, because I actually need to bring our cat to the vet now. I'm out of time. She has been having some breathing problems. Oh my gosh, I hope I didn't pass my stress on to her. But I need to bring her to the VAT now, so I do need to sign off. But really, before that, real quick, if you want, um, if you like what you heard, please do consider like subscribing to the show, following the show, referring it to a friend. Um, write a review, um, and also get my free course. I recently um kind of like did a review, a whole kind of uh what is that? I'm trying to think of that word, but where I just refresh the whole course. It's a free course, it's a free five-day email course, and um that's going to give you my overall framework around how I actually build a business on the side, even though I work full-time, I'm in HR. How do I go out and talk about my business with confidence, without fear? Um, and all of this while having also a personal life with two kids and family and husband and all of that, and also taking care of myself. So if that's something that you want, go to Sharonsingsudu.com forward slash start. I'll put the link in the show notes as well. I also recently opened up a few slots for my one-on-one power hour with me, and that's where we can sit down and then we can talk about you know whether you don't know what business you want to start, you don't have an idea, you don't know where to start, or maybe you have an idea of what you want to do, but you are afraid of putting yourself out there because you're still working a full-time job. You can get my HR insider's um perspective on how you can approach this in a way that does not jeopardize your career and your job. So we can also talk about that, or maybe you're feeling very overwhelmed, like I was, and I can guide you through also some how do you put in place a system, even if you only have half an hour a day, an hour a day, or a few minutes here and there, it's all about putting in a system that can help you to be consistent and to show up consistently for your business over a period of time, like to keep it sustainable, right? So, if that's something that you want, also I'll leave the link in the show notes. It's a calendar link. I cannot remember the whole link, but I'll put it in the show notes. And if you're following me on LinkedIn, it's always going to be on my featured section in my profile, so you can also find the links there. Okay, I have to sign off now. I hope you enjoyed this episode, and I'll catch you in the next episode. Bye.