183: Why You Feel Exhausted Building Your Career or Business (And What’s Really Draining You)

Have you ever felt deeply exhausted, discouraged, or disillusioned while working toward something that truly matters to you - your career, your business, or your long-term goals?

In this episode, I share what I’ve been personally moving through over the past few weeks, and the deeper reason many high-achieving working women feel drained even when they’re doing “all the right things.”

This episode isn’t about time management or productivity hacks.

It’s about how a lack of self-belief and self-trust quietly running in the background drains our energy, leaving us feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and feeling like we want to give up.

In this episode, I share:

• Why exhaustion isn’t always about workload
• How doubt and uncertainty drain more energy than action
• Why acceptance is not giving up but a powerful reset
• How to build self-trust when progress feels slow
• What to do when even loved ones don’t believe in your dreams
• How to stay committed without burning out or rushing the process

If you’re a working woman building something meaningful alongside a full life and wondering why it feels so heavy lately, this episode is for you.

Key Takeaways

• Exhaustion often comes from doubting the outcome, not the effort
• Acceptance clears emotional resistance and restores clarity
• Self-belief is a muscle, not a personality trait
• Big goals exist to shape who you become, not just what you achieve

Resources

• Follow the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes
• CLICK HERE to download the weekly guide with key insights and actions
• CLICK HERE to book a free discovery call if you want support navigating burnout, visibility, or career uncertainty

Links are in the show notes and on https://sharonsinghsidhu.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Hello there, and welcome to this week's episode of the podcast. So this week I wanted to address this topic around exhaustion, feeling discouraged or disillusioned about building, you know, your I mean, I'm gonna say in the context of my own business, but whatever goals you might be working on right now in your career or in your business, sometimes we can feel like uh, you know, like really tired, really exhausted or discouraged. I'm sharing this because this has been what I've been feeling the past week, probably the last couple of weeks. You know, uh, I think it isn't so much about how uh, of course, as working moms, we all have a very full plate. If you are working full-time, you've got kids, you've got family, maybe taking care of elderly parents, and then at the same time, maybe you're trying to show up uh on LinkedIn, you know, like I am, uh building my business on the side, uh, generating, you know, other income streams or working on that. So if that's you, I sometimes uh of course acknowledge, yes, I do acknowledge that we do have a lot of things. We have a very full plate, we are playing multiple roles, wearing many, many hats, and then sometimes things happen in life, you know, kids get sick, pets get ill, parents need a little bit more support, or uh work gets busy, whatever, you know. We uh we just I think that's life, we all go through it. Um, and but you know, when you're in it, either you can feel like you're the only one in it, or you can feel completely overwhelmed. And so I wanted to record this episode to share a little bit about what probably what else could be going on that's making us feel this way, and then of course, I always like to have practical, tangible actions uh that we can do, right? And that would help our situation. So I think the first thing that has really helped me is to first of all just be grateful. I know this is very uh I guess overstated or like cliched, you know, having a gratitude practice, but I do believe that helps to put us in a more uh constructive mood, okay, uh, and feeling in order to then um accept, you know, accept the situation, and I think a lot of times we mistake accepting a situation for lowering a standard or giving in to something or condoning a certain behavior by somebody else or whatever or the situation and not making progress. But I feel that that isn't really what acceptance is. Acceptance is really really powerful, of course. Before acceptance, it's awareness, right? Being aware of the situation in the first place. Because if you're not even aware of the situation, you're gonna continue to keep pushing, hustling, or maybe you're just going to totally give up and say, This is not worth it, this is not working, nothing is working, why bother? And then I feel that's really when you really just settle for something less. It's not about acceptance, isn't about settling for something less or giving up on your goals and dreams, but um actually it is actually the step that you need to release and let go of whatever resistance you're fighting against and pushing against and uh bargaining and complaining against. You first need to set that down by accepting. It's only by accepting then we can see more clearly because we are no longer clouded by strong emotions, resentment, uh, anger, you know, all these strong emotions can can kind of cloud our judgment, can it really narrow our perspectives and make us only see a very small piece of the bigger picture? So I think we need to first of all uh be aware this is what's happening, and then accept okay, this is the reality of the situation, you know, the the kids are not well, the the parents need help, work has got a specific deadline, and the business, you know, I'm not able to have the time uh at the moment at least to show up the way I want to show up. So these are like the facts, right? The reality. So we want to acknowledge that, and then we want to accept that and also be grateful. I think that's the first shift that has I've learned that I wouldn't say the first shift, I would say um one of the biggest things that really helped me to release and let go of those strong, negative, resistant, overwhelmed emotions is to just acknowledge that whatever difficulty or challenge you're experiencing now, there is always an opportunity in it, there's always a lesson in it, and it is really here to help you to become that version of yourself that you need to be in order to have whatever it is that you want, right? So that's a very important step. And the key point I wanted to make around this topic about how it feels so difficult and feeling so exhausted, discouraged, and disillusioned, you know, to keep going and uh working on the thing that's really important for us. I mean, for me, it is about building my business, obviously, it is also about creating a life for my family, my kids, myself. And you know, I obviously have big goals and I have plans on how I want to get there, and those plans involve taking action, right? And the key point I want to make is that it is not often the actual task. Yes, there might be a lot of things you need to do, but I think that's something that's not so conscious and so obvious to many of us that's causing us to feel so exhausted, like we just want to give up, it's too much, it's so overwhelming. Uh, it is kind of a certain on a certain level a lack of self-belief and trust uh that you can make it work, that it's happening, that you have it, you have what it takes. So this lack of self-belief, kind of like in the background, it's like running multiple apps in the background, you know. Uh, and this lack of self-belief is a huge app that's taking up a lot of power, that's running in the background that you're not even seeing, um, but it is draining a lot of power and draining a lot of energy. So that um, you know, I think is the major key thing that makes us feel this way. Because think about it, right? If if you knew that you no matter what, you are going to succeed, this is just a little road bump you need to get over. It's like en route to where you are going, and you know for sure, you know, you're certain that that's exactly what's going to be happening, then this is just just another thing to do, just another thing to get through. Because you you're encouraged and you're excited about the the destination, right? It's kind of like when you've um you know you're going away on a holiday, and then prior to that, there are certain things maybe you need to do at work in order to then go and enjoy your holiday, knowing full well that you can go on your holiday, no one's gonna bother you, you know, you don't have to check your emails, you don't really have to do any work, and you know that's 100% for certain that's how it's it's structured, that's how it's gonna work. You know, it's it's just okay a minor inconvenience you have to get through at the moment, but you know the end point it is already confirmed and it's worth it, right? So I think that that's really what's happening in the background is lack of self-belief and self-trust that whatever that we're doing, it is exactly going to help us get to where we want to go. So, um, I think when we are not having the self-belief and self-trust, then what happens is every little um challenge or difficulty that comes along can then drain even more energy, right? Not only are you already having that app running in the background, then every other thing that comes along can further drain us, and that can make us feel even more exhausted. And then obviously, when you're exhausted, you tend to get more discouraged, more irritable, and more disillusioned, and feel like you want to give up, right? Uh, and I tell you what, sometimes, even for me, you know, like this lack of belief is kind of confirmed by the people around me, you know, and sometimes even by our loved ones telling us that we should just stop doing this, you should just give up. You're not making it, you know. Like, why are you doing all this, spending all your time and energy on something that's not working? And of course, that hurts a lot, right? Because it's coming from people that you expect to be supporting your dreams and your goals, and when you don't get that, it can be difficult, it can hurt a lot. But I want to also offer you a reframe, something that I've heard from um, you know, my my coach before, and she also mentioned that you know the the reason why sometimes loved ones ask you to give up, it isn't it isn't to deliberately intentionally hurt you, because actually what what they're trying to do is to um save you, or rather, they feel like they're watching you feeling discouraged and feeling hurt and feeling disappointed, and they don't want you to hurt, right? And so they want to try to make you feel better, and that could be one way that they're trying to make you feel better by asking you to maybe you know do something else. Why do you keep hurting yourself? It's almost like you keep banging your head against the wall, and they're like, Why are you still doing this? You know, why are you doing this to yourself? And um, and of course, you know, with sometimes there there could be something else going on, like on a deeper level, maybe they also have their own fears and regrets about not pursuing their dreams and how they have felt, and they want to save you from feeling the kind of regret and disappointment they themselves feel, right? And and ultimately it is your responsibility to believe in your own dreams, not anyone else's. So to expect other people to believe in what we're working on, it's kind of to me quite an unreasonable expectation. It's like a lot to expect from people. I mean, you always think about the Martin Luther King speech, I have a dream speech, right? He he started with I have a dream and then he rallied people around his dream. He didn't start off by asking everyone, hey, you know, I have this dream, and all of you, you know, support me on this dream first, right? So you have to be the first one to believe in your dream more than everybody else, when everyone else doesn't even believe in you. Uh, and that kind of level of self-belief is um you need to work on it, it's not going to just happen just like that, because there are gonna be things that happen throughout the day as you are doing things, people come along that keeps like poking on that, right? And it isn't because all these people want you to give up. I feel like it is also the the ways, the universe's way of checking to make sure that this is really a dream that we really want, that we really want to fight for, that we really want to put everything in for. I know, like my dreams of kind of you know growing my side business. It's been like several years now, and along the way, of course, there are many challenges, and they I see like the reason why I'm still here is because it really does matter to me that much that I'm sticking with it. That is when I look back and I realize, and that is how I become more certain that this is what I really want, and this is how I grow even more self-belief to press on when things are hard, because I know deep down this really matters to me so much that it doesn't matter if even if I die, okay, and I never fulfill this dream, and not a single person ever believed in me along the way, sure, along the way, like you know, the past couple of weeks, I will feel dejected and I'll feel discouraged, and I would wish that things were different and people were different, but I know that at the end of it all, even if I you know I did this thing until the day I die, and even if nothing worked out, I ask myself often, uh, can I live with that? Would I um have regretted the time and energy and resources I put into it? And I would say no, because ultimately, whatever that we are pursuing, this big dream that you're pursuing, yes, it obviously is about the dream. The dream is there to kind of pull us in the right direction, to inform us when we're in the wrong direction, but ultimately, the whole point about having this big dream that pulls you in a much deeper way beyond yourself, I believe it is, and that all these challenges that come up to kind of test you to see if this hey, is this really what you want? Is this really what you want? Are you sure this is what you want? I I feel like sometimes I see these events and incidents and people coming and kind of challenging me as kind of the universe's way of asking a question. You know, you sure this is really what you want? If I mean, if this is really what you want, I'm going to support you 100% behind you. Um, just make sure that you're gonna put your all your energy into something that really matters to you, and so I do see it like that. Sometimes I kind of have a sense of humor around it. I'm like, alright, already, you know, I I I can see the confirmation, and and there are times when I'm asked these questions and I have made changes, I've course corrected, I've let things go because they weren't really what I actually really wanted, even though at first I said I wanted it. But when the test came, I realized, oh, you know what? I really don't want it so badly anymore, and and that's fine. And so the purpose of your big goals and dreams, um, it is to give you direction, it is to help you course correct when you need to, and ultimately, most of all, it is to help you to keep growing and learning and stepping into the next level and version of yourself, um, and who you are becoming in the process. So I feel like that's really the point of it all. So even if I died tomorrow or the diet uh you know 80 years old, 90 years old, and I didn't actually achieve, I mean I air quotes achieve that goal that I wrote down in my diary, the revenue goals, and you know, like the lifestyle and everything, uh, I think it would have been worth it. Because, and that's also the reason why that while we want to have these big goals and dreams to strive for and work towards, we also don't want to miss out the process of getting there, which ultimately is the whole point, you know. And I know this is true now, even as I'm recording this, because I am just getting goosebumps as I am explaining this to you, and that's always a sign for me that I'm on that's exactly it. That's correct, that's the truth to me, at least. And so we want, and that's also the reason why I took my time to grow my business because I also have a young family, and I it wasn't like I wanted to deprive them of you know a certain lifestyle and experiences as they're growing up because they are never gonna get that time back, I'm never gonna get the time back, and it was worth it for me to grow my business more slowly in exchange for the experience that I could um have with them, and that is the reason why I always say, you know, you don't have to quit your job. For me, I continued to work in a career, I but I shaped it and molded it in a way that supported the life I wanted, the time I wanted with my family, the ability to provide experiences, but also also have the time to also enjoy those experiences with them, and then on the side, I grew the business bit by bit, and that that was my way. You'll you're gonna have your own way based on your own priority, right? So, anyway, uh yeah. So, the key point I just wanted to say is maybe just spend a few moments to reflect on why you're feeling so exhausted, so disillusioned, and disappointed. You know, check if it really is, because deep down you kind of like you doubt and wonder if you can actually ever achieve that dream and goal. And I want to help you to kind of shift that a little bit that yes, we do have those goals, the endpoint is there for a purpose. The purpose is to pull us in the right direction, and yes, of course, as you know, anytime you've achieved a goal, you've set it feels really good, we all love it, right? You hit that revenue goal, it feels amazing. Um, and then you're on to the next thing. So I've learned this time and time again, and at first I thought it was well, you know, I used to beat myself up to say that, oh, you're never grateful, you're always looking for something you you don't have, you're never grateful for what you have. And since incorporating a gratitude practice into my daily life, I uh I always at the end of the day list down the things I'm grateful for, and then the next morning I set goals for the next day, and it's gonna be the next thing for me, but again, with that big goal and dream kind of like um pulling me in the right direction or in the direction I want to go, and this is like a daily thing, and that is the process. The daily thing is the process, right? And the process step by step, day by day, I'm getting there, I'm getting there, and then I hit it, and it's like, oh nice now. The next thing, but you see what's happening in the process is as you hit those goals, you have stepped into that version of the sort of person who achieves those sort of goals, and so you keep growing, you keep expanding, just like anything you observe in the natural world that keeps growing and expanding, right? Until they die, right? And it's a cycle, and then it repeats, and whatever your beliefs are, reincarnation or whatever, that's the cycle of life. And so, you know, when you are feeling exhausted and overwhelmed, maybe you don't believe in yourself, you're disillusioned. Just know that this is part of the process. This is the process, as uh Joe Dispenser says. I love this quote where he says, the process of overcoming is the process of becoming. So your process of overcoming this challenge, this difficulty, this down cycle, this you know, this feeling of sadness, maybe even and disappointment, and you wonder, even doubt, right? We just want to embrace it, acknowledge it. We're not denying and suppressing it. It is the full human experience, it is part and parcel of the growth, without which we don't have growth, but we want to embrace it and we want to experience it, and then of course, we don't want to stay down in it for too long because we know it is part of the process, right? This is how we're gonna get to the next level that we want to get to. So, yeah, that's um that's what I wanted to share today. Um, and I guess just to quickly summarize what are some actionable things that you can do with this. Like if you are feeling pretty down at the moment now and your goal seems so far away and out of reach, just first of all acknowledge where you are, be aware. It's great that you're aware uh where you are, acknowledge it, be grateful for it because it is exactly where you need to be in order to step up and grow, whether it's skill, experience, even the emotional capacity to handle this, it is expanding you in a way so that you can get to that next level that you want to get to. This is the process, okay. Um, second thing that maybe you can do, which I would highly recommend. I've done it for years, it's changed my life, which is um have a gratitude practice, you know, meditate on it, reflect on it, be grateful for whatever challenge it is, and then kind of like maybe spend a moment to reflect on what is the lesson you can draw from it, what is the insight you can draw from it. And then I think the third thing that really has helped me is also understanding that um. You know, that's more than just my physical self. You know, we all have a higher level of consciousness and awareness, which we know, right? You wouldn't be able to see what you're experiencing and see what you're going through and feeling without tapping into this higher level of awareness. But beyond that, there is something even greater than that. Uh, for me, I'm a pretty spiritual person, and so I obviously believe in something greater than myself and all of us here, and yet we're all connected in some way. I get very inspired by just looking at the way the natural world works, the harmony, balance, and order. I am very amazed at how our human body works, you know, all those processes that are happening in your body unconsciously, your heart's beating, your t your temperatures are being regulated, you know, your entire like digestive system that just works like clockwork. It is pretty awesome to me. And so I know there is something far greater than myself, and and I know that you know, um, we are all kind of evolving and growing all the time. There is a benevolent force universe, you know, that um guides all of this, keeps it in all working order to me. And so I know that I'm on the right path. I build that faith and certainty beyond the logic, beyond our small logical minds can conceive. And that part has really, really helped me. I think, especially in moments where I'm out of ideas, I'm desperate, and I am feeling completely powerless and helpless. That's what I kind of reach into. I will just simply tell myself, okay, fine, I don't understand any of this, but I know there's a greater power working here, um, and it is working for me, it's got my back, this is exactly where I need to be. You're almost like, I mean, I feel for me it's almost like brainwashing myself and kind of um, but in another more I guess more palatable way of saying it is you are reframing, you are rewiring, you're changing your default thought processes and habits that maybe have not really helped you to get to where you want to be. So if your existing thought processes and the way you be behave and feel um has only got you to where you are now, you know that you have to change that because without changing that, you're going to only just have more of what you already have now, right? So I hope that today's episode um gives you a little bit more of a different perspective that it encourages you and it inspires you and gives you some practical tips of what you can do to help you to uh pull yourself through this period, uh, like I have. And so I am still in it, I am with you. Okay, we are human beings, and so there are tough moments as well that I also work through. Um, and these are just a few things that really help me, and I'm going to be continuing to work on it myself. So if you enjoyed this episode, I really would appreciate. Obviously, if you're listening on Apple Podcast, do leave a review, or even better, share it with a friend who you think might benefit from this podcast. Uh, and then if you want to get the accompanying guide, what I'm starting to do now is to put together weekly guides that accompany every episode with the key points, the practical action. So you just have a quick reference. You know, if you if you prefer reading and you don't want to listen, you can also get these weekly guides. You can go to my website, which is at jerensingcedo.com and click on the tab that says guides and subscribe. So when you subscribe, what happens is you know, first of all, you're the first to know when the podcast goes live. In fact, I always tell my subscribers first before I even mention any of it on LinkedIn. You will also get the uh accompanying guide that goes along with every episode from now on. I've been doing this probably for the past few weeks now. Um, and you know, if you're a working mom or a woman, right, who is uh wanting to explore how I can help you to overcome challenges that you might be facing in your career. Maybe you want to overcome burnout or uh you're facing some difficulties, taking consistent actions to build your business. Uh, you can also book a discovery call with me. Discovery calls are free. It's just both for you and me to explore if we're a good fit to work together, if I'm the right person who can help you to overcome these challenges and difficulties and maybe make a plan and with clear direction of what to do next, then you can also book a discovery call with me. Again, that's also on my website at sharensingo.com. There is a tab that says discovery call, you can click that, and I will put the links also in the show notes. Alright, thank you so much for listening, and I'll catch you in the next episode. Bye.